You may have seen typologies of heroin bags before, but here’s a look at a different, and potentially less dangerous, category. This collection of vintage condoms includes everything from wrappers and “envelopes” to actual tins, and the designs are undeniably striking. The branding is the real entertainment: would you really buy a condom called “Sedatex”? How about the understated “Pousse L’Amour”?
“Fulton” brand condoms cater to the patriotic, with wavy blue and red lines on white paper. “Devilskin” promises protection for a full three years, while “Perma-Tex” is sold “for the prevention of disease only,” reflecting the hygienic tone common in condom sloganeering. “Bufalo” features a slightly phallic charging buffalo, perhaps hinting at what its use might unleash, and I particularly like the oriental architecture silhouettes on “Odalisca.”
The cheerful simplicity of “The Best” really does make it seem like the best, even if it could easily be mistaken for a political pin. These printed-paper wrappers are so graphically inventive and enjoyable that it raises a question about what happened to contemporary condom design. Trojan is rather dull, and those NYC-brand condoms were something of a flop, pun intended.
That leaves us mostly with novelty or vanity condoms, such as, well, a Barack Obama rubber. Hot. With the added charm of nostalgia, these vintage condoms manage to feel both elegant and amusing. And if you’re looking to add some style to your prophylactic life, you could always buy a vintage condom tin and use it to store your modern condoms.
eBay has a surprisingly large amount of condom paraphernalia, including a nice Trojans tin, though I’d still choose the Golden Pheasant. There’s even a book on vintage condom design, aptly titled Remember Your Rubbers! And really, shouldn’t contemporary artists try their hand at condoms as a medium? It feels like a genre waiting to happen—just get Damien Hirst on it before we all start making our own tiny Jackson Pollocks.
